Living INTO Your Potential

I recently attended a conference and I had occasion to chat with a new acquaintance in which my coaching work came up. During the conversation, she talked about all the guilt she feels about “not living up to [her] potential.” That moment struck me immediately. Not living up to her potential? What does that even mean and who decides? She clarified that her guilt resides around not living up to her own standards.

I think my new acquaintance got it right, it is our own standards we should be striving toward, but my coaching experience has revealed that so many of us are walking around striving to meet external expectations. These external standards shaped by societal expectations, or familial expectations, or some other source outside of ourselves. And what that means is that our striving might be mis-directed or causing stress we don’t need or driving us to unhappiness rather than fulfillment. And if you’ve been following me for any length of time, you understand my underlying mission is to help folks find greater fulfillment.

So this conversation got me thinking…what if instead of striving to “live up to our potential” we started striving to live INTO our potential? This reframing seems to offer something rather more liberating and empowering than what we’ve been handed through our upbringing and socialization.

Living into your potential is about embracing growth and evolution as an ongoing journey, rather than a destination to reach. It’s about recognizing that potential is not a static endpoint, but a dynamic force that evolves with us as we navigate through life’s twists and turns. So let’s explore what it might be like to live into your potential…

Embracing Alignment Over Expectation

When we focus solely on living up to our potential, we often fall into the trap of chasing external markers of success—such as wealth, status, or recognition—without considering whether these goals align with our true values and passions. How many of us have given ourselves the space and time to actually articulate our values? This can lead to a life that feels hollow and unfulfilling, as we find ourselves striving for achievements that hold little meaning to us personally.

On the other hand, living into our potential invites us to embrace authenticity and alignment with our innermost desires and aspirations. It encourages us to define success on our own terms, based on what truly matters to us, rather than conforming to society’s standards or others’ expectations. By honoring our unique strengths, values, and passions, we can cultivate a sense of purpose and fulfillment that transcends external validation.

Embracing Growth Over Perfection

The pursuit of living up to our potential can also foster a perfectionistic mindset, where we become hyper-focused on achieving flawless outcomes and avoiding failure at all costs. This fear of falling short can be paralyzing, preventing us from taking risks or embracing new opportunities for growth.

Living into our potential, however, shifts the focus from perfection to progress. It encourages us to view setbacks and challenges not as failures but as valuable learning experiences that contribute to our growth and development. By embracing a growth mindset—a belief that our abilities can be cultivated through effort and perseverance—we open ourselves up to endless possibilities for learning, innovation, and self-discovery. And in the process we can gain deep personal clarity we didn’t have when perfection was the goal.

Embracing Presence Over Comparison

In a world driven by comparison and competition, the pressure to live up to societal standards of success can feel overwhelming. We’re constantly bombarded with images of other people’s achievements and accomplishments, leading us to question our own worth and significance. Social media has demonstrably worsened our perspectives about our own lives in comparison to others.

Living into our potential invites us to shift our focus inward, cultivating a deep sense of self-awareness and presence. Rather than measuring ourselves against others, we learn to celebrate our unique journey and appreciate the progress we’ve made along the way. By embracing mindfulness and gratitude, we can find contentment and joy in the present moment, rather than constantly striving for some elusive future ideal.

Embracing Contribution Over Achievement

Ultimately, living into our potential is not just about personal success—it’s about making a meaningful contribution to the world around us. When we shift our focus from achieving for the sake of ego gratification to contributing to the greater good, we tap into a deeper sense of purpose and fulfillment.

Whether it’s through acts of kindness, creative expression, or advocacy for causes we believe in, living into our potential allows us to use our unique gifts and talents to make a positive impact on the lives of others. By aligning our personal goals with a larger sense of purpose, we can create a ripple effect of positive change that extends far beyond our individual sphere of influence.

Living into your potential is not about striving to meet external expectations or fulfill some predetermined notion of success. It’s about embracing alignment, fostering growth and resilience, cultivating presence and gratitude, and making a meaningful contribution to the world. So let go of the pressure to live up to some idealized version of yourself, and instead, embrace the journey of living into your fullest potential—one step at a time.

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